More Sugar Than Spice

Take it Back

I just read this post on my girlfriend Nina’s blog and it got me thinking.

Is there ever a way to undo the hurt inside of us? We can forgive and sometimes we even forget, but does it ever go away?

I was a victim of domestic violence before I was married, and when I think about that time in my life I do not hold anything against the abuser, nor do I remember all of the details, but I do know to this day I still feel a pit in my stomach if I see someone that looks like him. But I made the decision to take my life back, and as a result I was able to find true happiness in God, my husband and my family.

That being said, I am often tempted to google the abusers name or run a background check on him, but I usually dismiss these thoughts because I believe letting him have my focus in anyway is allowing him to have more of me than he should have ever been given.

About a year after Travis and I were married, I did look him up once. And I found out he was involved in a vehicular manslaughter in the same small town Travis and I were married, on the same day. I am sure there is a reason, and I know this mans heart, so I can honestly say he would probably want to take back the events of that day. However, because there was no reason for him to be in that town, on our day, that pretty much scared me into not wanting to know anything else.

Elfa Shelving

We are (still) in the process of organizing everything in our house. We moved in about a year and a half ago from a house which was about half of the size therefore we have a huge need for decorations, window treatments and shelving.

We have been primarily focused on the downstairs, with the exception of Monkeys toy room and bedroom which have gotten some well deserved attention lately. However, I am getting the bug to work on our room and retreat so I have been casually looking at furniture and ways to organize and combine our office needs with my scrapbooking stuff.

The Container Store is having their annual sale on Elfa Shelving, so we decided to think about it for our retreat/office/craft room. Without the 30% off sale, the shelves are a little pricey so in the past we have been a little put off. However, the quality is good and should last a long time.

Love Is In The Air

With Valentines Day approaching, I have been racking my brain for what I can do for Travis this year. Our six year anniversary is also in February, as is Monkey’s birthday.

We have been passing around a horrendous cold since before Christmas so we have either been sick or caring for the sick for too long. I have been working on refinancing our house, potty training the dog and Monkey, attending MOPS, cooking for MOPS, MOMS and The Rock, and we are starting Kindermusik this week.

Travis has two pretty big web projects right now, and his office is moving at his full time job so there is rush and stress relating to that. He has been working late a little more and has been talking to/meeting with side-business clients weekly.

Did I mention we are starting a new class tonight at church?!

We have been going non-stop, and I for one am tired! Don’t get me wrong, I am so thankful to have the opportunities we have and I am not complaining by any means, but I could certainly use a nap.

So, how do we refocus on each other during the up and coming season of love? Valentines Day is no big deal for us, but I do love our anniversary. I love to celebrate the love we found so many years ago and still have to this day. On our wedding day we gave music cd’s to our guests with our favorite and meaningful songs. Travis makes me another edition of the cd every year, and I have yet to come up with something that means that much to him. We have played the Romantic Nights game, and occasionally still do. We have date night about once a month, and spend hours playing WoW together, but I ready for something new.

Little Blessings

Today, Monkey and I bundled up and went out into the freezing cold for our first visit to preschool.

Little Blessings came highly recommended by one of Travis’ clients and a MOPS mommy also chimed in with a raving review, so we decided to check it out. We purposely went unscheduled so we could see the teachers and students in action. Upon arrival the first thing I noticed is the building wasn’t marked very well. I was unsure where to park, so I just parked at the front of the church, unloaded Monkey and headed for the doors. Locked. So we walked around to the side of the building and found all of the doors to also be locked. I called from my cell phone. No answer. I peeked inside the windows and could see a couple of students so I tried the phone again. No answer. Keep in mind in Colorado today we had a high of about 25 degrees, so I am getting impatient fast. We walked back to a different door and I called one final time and they answered. I explained why we were there and she said she could almost see me on camera and she will let us in.

We toured the facility and watched a few classes in action and I have to admit I was less than impressed. The classrooms were small and the students didn’t really look like they were all that interested. The tour guide explained because of the size of the rooms, the state will only allow eight students, instead of ten. She said it as though it was a good thing, but I have to say I don’t see it that way.

We looked at the playground equipment which was covered in snow and she explained the children go outside and play every day. I must have made a strange face or something, because she looked at me, paused and then explained when it is cold they just go for a walk on the sidewalk near the road. Again, less than impressed.

There were other issues that I didn’t feel right about (again the blessing/curse of discernment) but the moral of the story is we are going to pass.

Bull Headed

Bluto often sleeps most of day long without more noise than the occasional snort, proving he might be the laziest dog I have ever met.

However, lately when he is in his kennel at night he has been whining.  We got into the habit of letting him out before we went to bed, and if we ever forgot, we would find quite the mess in the kennel in the morning.  I always found this odd, since most dogs won’t go in the kennel, but read online Bulldogs will make a mess in their kennel when they are upset with their owners.

This was also confirmed by Melody of Lobopuppies.com who indicated she has a ‘diva dog’ who will relieve herself on the floor if Melody doesn’t throw her toy as soon as it is dropped at her feet!

However, cleaning the kennel and the dog is much easier since we now own a dog that is less than 7lbs, so I was happy to do it, blaming myself for not paying attention.

However, today, Travis let Bluto out for his morning duties and put him back into his kennel after since Monkey and I were not up yet.  I came downstairs less than 30 minutes later and found a urine soaked puppy and a very smelly living room.

I got everything cleaned up, the dog fed and medicated (the last of his second prescription of giardia meds) and started my morning routine.  I fed Monkey, cleaned the kitchen and living room and pulled out the vacuum.  I let Bluto outside to do his business again, and when I let him in he immediately hid under the couch because I started vacuuming the living room and he’s a big baby.

As I walked back from putting the vacuum away, I hear Monkey say “She peed on the carpet” (Monkey thinks everyone is a ’she’).  I came around the corner and sure enough - not one, not two, but three different pee spots on the carpet!

Why?  We had a good morning, he was pampered and brushed and fed and even had a piece of cheese with his pill.  We had played and he was curled up by the fire just prior to this whole incident.

Could he be so bull headed that he was mad that I actually vacuumed even though he doesn’t like it?  If that is the case, what everyone has said is right.  My second baby is my problem child.

Stop the Insanity

Robert Palmer sang in 1989:

You can’t sleep. You can’t eat.

There’s no doubt. You’re in deep…

You might as well face it

You’re addicted to love

That song was performed almost 20 years ago, so do the same rules apply? Are we still addicted to love?

I think on some level we are. Millions of dollars a year are spent on Hallmark cards, online dating agencies, and romantic comedy movies. Almost everyone craves love and companionship.

What else are we addicted to?

According to Gregory Bloom, author of Overcoming Entertainment Addiction we are addicted to the entertainment zone, which in my house primarily includes the internet and television. Mr. Bloom spoke at our MOPS meeting on Tuesday and he really got me thinking.

Five Faves in the Kitchen

Travis and I both like to cook and I love to bake.  There are things I use in the kitchen that I would pay any amount to replace, should the need ever arise.  Here are my five favorite things in the kitchen:

1.  I cannot make cookies without my pampered chef stoneware. I have tried, God knows I have tried. But instead of cookies I make flat, oily pancakes that end up rock hard within ten minutes. It is a science wonder really.
2. I never used rubber spatulas for anything until I bought some from Williams Sonoma. How they get plastic to stay perfect up to 500 degrees is beyond me, but I cannot live without them. And they clean my flat top stove. What more could a girl want?
3. I absolutely LOVE my crock pot. I didn’t use it when I was gone for nine hours a day, but now that I am home I love to get everything ready in the morning and forget about it until right before Travis comes home. This is a must have for me.
4. My pampered chef nut chopper. I love it because it is big and I can chop a lot at one time. I love it because it is super easy to clean. But most of all I love it because it is so easy to press Monkey can work it. I have to admit, this is my second one and the plastic is cracking on this one just as it did on the last, but I haven’t found anything better so in my cabinet it stays.
5. Last but not least, I love Monkeys Learning Tower. For those of you who just said ‘Monkeys what?’ let me explain. It is an adjustible stool that is fully enclosed on all sides. Monkey can use it to help me cook, or do crafts. Because it holds up to 300 lbs, daddy can use it to paint the ceiling trim and mommy can use it to clean the top of the fridge. This is the stool of all stools.

What are your five faves in the kitchen? Be sure to let us know why and where you got them so we can get them too!

Britax Regent

Monkey is about ready to outgrow her carseat, and is legally ready for a booster seat. She will be three next month and weighs 37 lbs and her carseat only goes to 40 lbs. As I look at her, I cannot imagine her little body being able to sustain a car crash in just a booster seat, so I looked into the whole thing a little more and found a company by the name of Britax which makes 5 point harness seats that go up to 80 lbs.

The Britax Regent got excellent safety reviews online, therefore I purchased one online through Babies R Us. I was so excited when the package arrived within a week. I pulled the seat out of the box and the first thing I noticed is how huge this seat is. When I say big, I mean it. I can sit in the thing! If I didn’t have my large SUV, there is no way I could fit this in. Not to mention if I had two kids that had to sit side by side.

Cast Away

We had Trav’s parents over last night and although we don’t always see eye to eye, I really am blessed to have them in my life. They are among the most caring people I have ever met, and I never doubt their love for us, and their focus on God.

We ended up talking about the situation with my family, and although one night isn’t nearly enough time to give them a complete picture they’ve had some great experiences they shared and I had a couple of ‘ah-ha’ moments.

My mother in law gets me. She knows my heart and she knows I care too much about what others think. She told me she spent years of time, which she now realizes was wasted, worrying about what others thought. She too had disagreements with her family and still doesn’t have a great relationship with them. I do know in my brain that I care too much, but in my heart I just don’t know how to cast those feelings away.

On one hand I get angry with my family for putting all of this on me. I don’t know if that is their intent, but somehow it has become my responsibility to make things work with my sister. Because I have made the conscious decision to step back and allow my sister to work things out for herself for once in her life, I have been thrown away as though I never meant anything to them. And that hurts.

Do You See What I See?

As I mentioned before, Travis bought me a new camera in November. He purchased a Canon Rebel, which is a digital SLR. Our sweet brother in law had some extra camera lenses, so we have been experimenting with a few different lenses to help us determine what we will most likely purchase in the future.

Because of these experiments I have been really looking at things differently. My mind is constantly wondering what things would look like from a different angle, in a different light, etc. Overall, I have just been burning to take some pictures!

Last night I had a dream (keep in mind, I rarely remember my dreams) that I offered all of our neighbors photo shoots, which allowed me to earn some extra cash and meet our neighbors at the same time. In my dream I had advertised a special to our neighborhood, allowing everyone to have a photo day for a pretty reasonable amount. I am by no means a professional photographer, but I do think this would be fun. If I ever did this, I would just offer the photo shoot for a small fee, and give a digital copy of the photos. I can print 4 x 6 proofs as well as part of the package, but then the fee would have to go up slightly. Since I can print up to 13 x 19 in house, I could offer print packages as well. Of course those wouldn’t be included in the fee.

What are some pros and cons that you guys see? Has anyone done anything like this, and if so what did you learn from the experience? Please leave any comments you would like, along with tips or things to look out for! I am by no means looking at going pro or doing this for a living… I love my job right now, but rather it is just a hobby that I think other people can benefit from.